I have been absoltuly obsessed with Provers 3 lately. I read it every day...And am wowed and convicted afresh every day as I study it....We always hear the verse Prov 3:5-6...Lean not on your understanding....Well...That is all fine and good. but whose understanding are we leaning on.....Go on to Prov 3:19-20 and be amazed. we are supposed to lean on the Lord's understanding...which is the same understanding he used to set the heavens in place...Wow..Why do I ever choose to lean on my own understanding instead of the understanding of the one who made the heavens with one word..Glory..ANd God has very much been askinWow. This has been the most intense, most wonderful,'most humbling...most amazing two months of my life...I could never have believed last february during the hardest month of my life what seeemd like the worst thing ever could result in this feb having Matthew..What a blessing! Watching matthew transfrom has been the coolest thing I have EVEr been a part of. When he came to us in dec, he could barely speak 3 words...Now he is speaking in sentences.He learns new words every day...we can go in public without making a scene.He is praying at dinner, lifting his hands to praise the lord, learning his colors, learning to dress himself, learning to run and play like a normal kid...He is going to the zoo for the first time. He is learning to sing Jesus loves me! Wow..God is healing his brain as we speak...IT is amazing to watch. HE can answer questions now. glory glory...IT has been amazing. And Alex is learning too. LEarning to share...Giving his favorite toys to matthew.Praying for matthew.Asking for treats for matthew.Hugging and looving his big bro. Even when matthew is very agressive and picking on alex, alex just keeps right on loving him. THrough matthew, alex is learning to live out the meaning of his name helper of mankind..who is like the Lord! Wow..
But boy have I needed the wisdom and understaning of the Lord in more ways than I could ever imagine! Have I needed to fall flat on my face and say jesus help me more than ever. And His wisdom and understaning even more than ever. Brining a traumatized child into your home is always hard..espically hard if it is a child with disabilites who cannot communicate very well..There have been many struggles.but God has been so faithful. I love how God orchestrated this journey every step. His understanding..His plan for what went on in my life last year was way better than I could imagine!I had no idea when I was leaning on my own understanding, wondering why god wasn't answering my prayers..THat He was waiting on perfect timing to answer..SEnding his perfect child for us to take care of...Matthew is better than I could have asked or imagined! This morning I was reading my bible in my fav pink chair. At 7 matthew slowly came down the stairs. He gave me his huge smile, then ran to my arms, curled up like a little baby...And I rocked my 54 pound little love and prayed for the plans God has for him. Trusting God is hard..But HIS plans are always better!~